Take your stinking paws off me, you damned dirty ape!

I have spent a good portion of my life dreaming of owning some sort of ape, monkey or chimpanzee. Actually it is more of a fantasy of being friends with one. You know, we would go to the park, watch movies, throw feces. All normal stuff friends do. Occasionally my monkey would throw on a tux and serve drinks to high society folks who came over to my house. In any event I use to suspect these thoughts would get me an early admittance into a mental institution until a friend of mine let me know about Helping Hands - Monkey Helpers for the Disabled. To quote their website "Helping Hands: Monkey Helpers for the Disabled is a national nonprofit serving quadriplegic and other people with severe spinal cord injuries or mobility-impairments by providing highly trained monkeys to assist with daily activities."

This may be the most amazing thing I have ever seen. Thankfully and sadly, I do not have a spinal injury that would make me eligible for the companionship of a capuchin monkey. I am wondering if I tell them my back hurts if they would let me have one temporarily.