Thursday, August 15, 2013

It shipped!

I just got a confirmation email from Apple that my new Macbook Air shipped.  It feels like yesterday that I guilted my mom into buying my current Macbook.  It was actually seven years ago I stole her credit card and told her she owed it to me for killing my father.  Time flies when you're masterbating.  So many good memories. Now I have to decide what to do with the old girl.

Part of me wants to blow her up with Chinese fire crackers I bought off a Mexican.  The other part wants to donate her to a child in need.  If one under privileged 14 year old boy wearing gloves is able to enjoy internet porn because of me, and I take two klonopins, I might sleep better at night. Decisions, decisions.


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