Seinfeld Moments

Everybody has them, those moments in life where you might as well be on TV. If my life is being scripted by some higher being I think some copyright infringement might be going on. I clearly rolled through a couple of classic episodes of 'Seinfeld' over the last few weeks.

For starters, I ordered Pakistani food the other day. Okay, not really. I ordered Indian food but I really wanted to incorporate Babu somehow. Anyway, I ordered some food and when it showed up at my place the bill was $60. Not the most expensive dinner I have ever had, but certainly more than I wanted to spend on takeout. As I sat eating my chicken tikka masala, ruing the day that delivery food could be so much, the UPS man showed up at my door. He had a package from a friend that included $60 in cash. I was dumbfounded by this. I was clearly 'Even Steven.' How could this be? It was like when Jerry threw a twenty-dollar bill out the window and found a replacement in his coat. We can just forget the part where the sixty bucks I got from UPS happened to be money my friend owed me. In my mind it all worked out.

Does everyone remember how much of a clean freak Seinfeld was? Do I really need to remind people of the toilet brush in the toilet story? Well, the other day, the toilet was clogged and I was too lazy to plunge it. It was late and I swear there was no dookie in it. Due to a bad judgment call on my part, I made the mistake of telling Sarah about my refusal to unclog the pipes. She ran out to the garage and got the plunger herself. While it was still clean she plunged my bloated stomach as I tried to hide in bed. If that wasn't bad enough, she hit me with it again after she used it. Later she would claim she washed it, but I am skeptical. To make matters worse, after we had a plunger war that at one point had me plunging her ear, she placed the plunger on my brand new black MacBook, which was only three hours old. In typical 'Seinfeld' fashion I wanted to throw the contaminated device in the trash.

Maybe both of these moments were 'had to be there' events to really get, but I figured I would share anyway.

If you didn't find this funny go read the interview with Will Ferrell in the new GQ. If you don't find that funny, you are obviously more broken than my fecal contaminated computer.