WHAT DO YOU WANT!?!?!?

Blowjob....

or wait a second,  maybe my money back. Could you give me my money back?

So I was reading the news today and see that Kevin Bacon and Kyra Sedgwick were among the Bernard Madoff victims (I know this has been known for awhile, but I mainly stay current by reading old Chinese newspapers that my fishmonger, Mr. Lee, uses to wrap my halibut). Anyhow, according to the article, Bernard Madoff fleeced them for everything they had and while I am sorry to hear about their misfortune, I think the real tragedy is going to be felt by us, the movie-going public.

While Bacon's been entertaining movie audiences for nearly 3 decades now, it's really only been the last few years that he's been remotely bearable. I mean sure, we all love him as the slightly perverse asshole that either wants to rape us (Sleepers, the Woodsman), kill us and bring us back to life (Flatliners, Stir of Echos), or drown us in a river (White Water Summer, The River Wild), but a lot of us forget some of his earlier, shittier movies like: He Said She Said, She's Having a Baby, and the aptly named Forty Deuce (so named because it was essentially 40X worse than shit).

Anyway, my point is that if the recent past has been any indicator, financial security has been a real boon for the Baconator's film choices. I mean, most of his recent films have been somewhat decent. My fear is that now that all that cash is gone, we're gonna see a whole new series of stinkers like Hollowman 3, Footloose 2, or some remake of Quicksilver with Carlos Mencia playing Paul Rodriguez.

Seriously, the only thing standing between us and the revival of Elizabeth McGovern's acting career, is the fact that The Closer is doing well on cable.

Let's keep our fingers crossed that the trustees can get as much of that cash back as possible.