I never thought I would say this, but there may actually be a use for Twitter after all. Besides of course for people to keep track of my bowel movements. That use is to notify me of where and when to eat. There is this new trend of high end roach coaches driving around Los Angeles. These trucks send out Twitter notes of where they will be so losers like me who want nothing more out of life than food can go find them. I think it is brilliant. I sit at home and wait for the message telling me where and when. It's like a fight club but instead of notifying me of where to get my ass kicked, it notifies me of where to get a stomach ache.
* I almost titled this post "Fight Club in my Mouth." Wow, that would have been a mistake.
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Twitter Douche
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