For the last twelve years I have been compiling a list of celebrities I would like to fight. I imagine a battle royale similar to me fighting a gaggle of first graders (nod to Jake). Tom Cruise can't weigh more than a six year old, could he? I figure I would start with the cast of Entourage and finish up with Estelle Getty. I would make that Golden Girl cry like a little bitch.
Sadly, as of last night I had to remove two people from my celebrity fight club. There is no chance of me fighting Freddie Prinze Jr. or Brendan Fraser. I sat next to them while I stuffed my gullet with sushi and I have to say they are both too large to beat with my own hands. I don't think I could win in a fight with either of them. It would be like me fighting a couple of 6th graders. Before you think of me as a big puss realize I am talking about sixth graders from the early '80s. The kind that smoke and have sex. I got no chance against them.
I would still fight Sarah Michelle Gellar though. She was at dinner also. I could take her. It would be a blood bath.
1 comment:
Oh no! Not Buffy!!!
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